View Askewniverse" Clapperboard Tee – Because 19-Minute Monologues Deserve Their Own Shirt

View Askewniverse" Clapperboard Tee – Because 19-Minute Monologues Deserve Their Own Shirt

"YOU KNOW, THERE'S A MILLION FINE LOOKING WOMEN IN THE WORLD..." but none of them are wearing this ode to Kevin Smith's cinematic universe—yet. Featuring a clapperboard for "Clerks 23, Take 37" (Scene 7: "Brody and Jay talking about everything and nothing for 19 minutes straight"), this shirt is a love letter to the View Askewniverse. With "Ask me about" hovering above and "VIEWASKEWNIVERSE" stamped below, it's perfect for fans who still debate whether Mallrats is a perfect movie (it is).

Why This Shirt is More Enduring Than Silent Bob’s Patience:
✔ UNISEX FIT – Flatters all genders, whether you’re a "snoochie boochies" enthusiast or a "37 dicks" scholar
✔ 12 NOSTALGIC COLORS – From Quick Stop black to RST Video heather gray
✔ 100% COTTON COMFORT – So soft it’s like wearing Jay’s trench coat (but less likely to get you arrested)
✔ HEATHER BLENDS – For that extra touch of "I’ve seen Chasing Amy 37 times" subtlety

PRODUCT FEATURES THAT EVEN WALT FLAHERTY WOULD APPROVE:
• Ribbed collar that stays crisp through every "I’m not even supposed to be here today" rant
• Side seams tougher than Dante’s retail stamina
• Lightweight fabric perfect for comic cons, weed dispensaries, or explaining the "porch monkey" redemption arc to normies

CARE INSTRUCTIONS (BECAUSE EVEN MOOBIES NEED MAINTENANCE):
🎬 Machine wash cold (max 30°C/90F) – no "hot box" drying
🎬 No dry cleaning (chemicals are for "soulless fuckers")
🎬 No bleach (unless you’re bleaching your hair like Banky)
🎬 Tumble dry low heat
🎬 Iron on low if you must (but wrinkles add "lived-in" authenticity)

PERFECT FOR:
• Kevin Smith disciples who can recite "Clerks" backward
• 90s indie film junkies who miss when movies had "heart and a fuckload of dick jokes"
• Anyone whose ideal first date involves debating "Star Wars" vs. "Lord of the Rings" over coffee
• People who still use "snoogans" as a verb

AVAILABLE IN 12 COLORS – Because even the Askewniverse deserves a fresh take.

WARNING: May cause spontaneous "I’m takin’ it back!" outbursts, intense debates about "Mallrats" as high art, and/or being banned from family gatherings for quoting "Chasing Amy" too accurately. "You’re closed, motherfucker!" 🚬🎥

KEYWORDS: View Askewniverse shirt, Kevin Smith tee, Clerks 23 merch, 90s comedy apparel, indie film gift, Jay and Silent Bob fan shirt, cult movie collectible, nostalgia tee, heather colors shirt, K.S. 1994 tribute.

EU representative: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY

Product information: Next Level 3600, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999/44/EC

Warnings, Hazard: For adults, Made in Honduras

Care instructions: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Do not bleach, Tumble dry: low heat, Iron, steam or dry: low heat, Do not dryclean